This is what happens when you ask a writer a random question.
Prep Work
Bags. Lots of bags. A cutting board won’t cut it (hahaha. ha. Moving on) because the watermelon as at least twice the size. If you’re as clumsy as me, you’ll want to cover the entire counter, but even the most precise foodies will need to cover a bunch of space. I use grocery bags, because there’s less wash. Just splatter then pitch.
Option 1: The Preferred Cut
Have your boyfriend cut the watermelon for you. Or spouse, roomie, mother, sister, random stranger passing by. Because let’s be real: eating watermelon is one of the most refreshing delightful things in life, but cutting the watermelon is practically torture, taunting you with the effort required to get to the delightful part.
Option 2: The Precision Cut
Are you very precise? This is the shortcut for you. Are you like me, just kinda follow the gist of directions? This cut will leave you frustrated beyond measure….Do Not Attempt!
- Cut the watermelon in half.
- Cut the sides almost all the way through.
- Cut a circle to separate the rind from the food.
- Cut a grid in the watermelon.
- Dump in bowl.
You can watch this video for a demonstration.
What was my struggle with this cut? I didn’t cut through the sides far enough and ended up with this:
Option 3: The Davinci Cut
This is my cut of choice if I am personally responsible for slicing watermelon for a gathering. In regards to creating the sculpture of David, Davinci said he “just cut everything away that wasn’t David.”
I’m not quite on par with Davinci, but this is the kids version: cut away everything that isn’t red.
- Cut the watermelon in half.
- Flip the half to where all you see is green. Cut the rind away one piece at a time.
- Cut grids in the block of watermelon left.
You can watch a video demonstration here.
Option 4: The Foodie Cut
Hungry? Here’s the cut for you!
- Cut the watermelon in half. (The wide way is preferred.)
The end. You now have a bowl of watermelon for you plus a bowl of watermelon for a friend.
Option 5: The Sloppy Cut
Not quite THAT hungry? Here’s a quick cut for when you want a bowl of watermelon for you, in an actual bowl.
- Cut the watermelon in half.
- Use a spoon to scoop all the watermelon into a bowl.
Finishing Up
Eat, eat, eat!!!! Oh and don’t forget to wipe up the sticky counter. And maybe mop the floor. Depends on how clumsy you are.
How do you cut watermelon? What’s your favorite cut? Share your ideas below, maybe I’ll try some of them out next time 🙂
I tried to share a video here but had to Facebook it…
I saw it on Facebook. That’s the Guinness way, which I have no chance of succeeding at with any fingers intact ;P